Washington, D.C. – In a moment of refreshing transparency, United States IRS Commissioner was caught mid-meeting staring wistfully out the window, absentmindedly twirling his pen.
“Maybe we build an aircraft carrier for Lake Michigan, just to assert dominance over Canada,” he continued, his eyes glazing over. “Or pay a team of elite scientists to genetically engineer a bison that can shoot lasers from its eyes. That feels very ‘America.’”
